THE HOT JOINTS » Britain

Video: Susan Boyle From ‘Britain’s Got Talent’

Chris Jones — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 17:37:18 +0000

Watch this amazing audition clip from “Britain’s Got Talent.” 47-year old Susan Boyle is jeered by the audience until she opens her mouth and begins to sing…

Susan Boyle Sings on Britain’s Got Talent 2009 Episode 1 @ Yahoo! Video

Obama Gives Queen iPod Loaded With His Speeches

Chris Jones — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 04:56:17 +0000

First he gave the British PM a box of crappy DVD’s that won’t play on European machines. Now he’s given the Queen of England an iPod.

Thankfully, he opted for an engraved version and at least had the forethought to upload a few things like…

Photos from the Queen’s 2007 White House State Visit
Photos from the Queen’s 2007 Jamestown, Va., Visit
Photos from the Queen’s 2007 Richmond, Va., Visit
Video from the Queen’s 1957 Jamestown Visit
Video from the Queen’s 2007 Jamestown Visit
Video from the Queen’s 2007 Richmond Visit
Photos from President Obama’s Inauguration
Audio of then-state senator Obama’s speech at the 2004 Democratic National Convention, and
Audio of President Obama 2009 Inauguration Address

I bet her majesty can’t wait to listen to Obama’s speeches on her shiny new iPod.

Unfortunately, Obama’s crack research team failed to uncover the fact that the Queen already has an iPod. But even if she didn’t, who the fuck gives the Queen of England an iPod? Is he serious?

What else does president Obama have in his gift bag this trip? Is he going to hand out a few Nintendo Wii’s and maybe a Macbook or two as well?

I bet the Russian president would get a kick out of playing Call of Duty: World At War.

-Chris Jones

British PM Grins Like Cheshire Cat During Obama Visit

Chris Jones — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 04:21:44 +0000

The Daily Mail has a hilarious piece about president Obama’s visit to Britain. Quentin Letts tells of PM Gordon Brown nearly “shattering the television camera lenses” with his “moony grin.”

Oh Gordon, your smile! The Prime Minister, appearing alongside Barack Obama after breakfast today, stared at his American visitor and almost shattered the TV camera lenses with his moony grin.

You could have played Jewish harp with his lower lip, it was stretched so twangy tight.

Messrs Mills and Boon, when next looking for a book cover for one of their romantic novellas, when next seeking an illustration of doggy devotion, could do worse than use a photograph of the Prime Minister at the meeting.

That’s only the beginning! Click over and read the rest.

-Chris Jones

Video: British PM Gets Shredded During EU Meeting

Chris Jones — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 14:36:16 +0000

If only someone would tell this exact thing to Barack Obama:

Poll: 1 In 5 Brits Say It’s Okay To Hit Women

Chris Jones — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 23:37:24 +0000

It’s starting to make sense why Britain is surrendering their country to Muslims. Like Muslims, Brits apparently have no respect for women.

According to The Sun, 1 in 5 British men think it’s okay to hit your wife or girlfriend. 14% think it’s ok to hit women if they’re “nagging” or “moaning.”

How about this, more than half of Brits think women are at least partly to blame for rape if she doesn’t clearly say no.

It sounds like Chris Brown needs to move to Britain where he can beat the hell out of his girlfriends with like minded individuals.

Let’s be clear on something, any man that hits a woman is a low-life piece of shit who should be in jail. Even if a woman hits a man, a man should never hit back.

I can’t believe this crap. It would never occur to me to ever raise my hand to a woman — it’s outrageous that so many people think it’s okay.

Leave the woman abusing to the savage Muslims. We civilized folk don’t do that.

-Chris Jones

Obama Fumbled Brown Visit Because He’s “Tired” And “Overwhelmed”

Chris Jones — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 03:58:37 +0000

Remember when close to half of the United States electorate said of Barack Obama, “he’s not ready” and “he’ll be in over his head” or “this is no time for on the job training” — guess what? We were right.

Americans and Brits have been trying to figure out why the president treated PM Gordon Brown like a relative he hates but is forced to visit with once a year, and now we know.

According to The Daily Telegraph in London, the reason for the ill-treatment of Brown was that the president was simply “overwhelmed.” White House sources are saying they fear Obama is not getting enough rest. Aww — the poor thing.

Sources close to the White House say Mr Obama and his staff have been "overwhelmed" by the economic meltdown and have voiced concerns that the new president is not getting enough rest.

Allies of Mr Obama say his weary appearance in the Oval Office with Mr Brown illustrates the strain he is now under, and the president’s surprise at the sheer volume of business that crosses his desk.

A well-connected Washington figure, who is close to members of Mr Obama’s inner circle, expressed concern that Mr Obama had failed so far to "even fake an interest in foreign policy".

It’s easy to criticize from the campaign trail and talk about how much better you could do it than president Bush, but I don’t remember Bush ever shirking his responsibilities because he was tired or overwhelmed. Mr. smart ass hope and change has discovered it’s not quite so easy to carry the fate of the free world on your back, especially when you’ve never even run a small company or had any executive experience at all.

You’d think with all the Ivy League education between the president and his wife they would no better than to give the PM of Great Britain a box of DVDs he could get off Amazon.com. DVD’s I might add that can’t be played in the UK anyway, because they’re not coded correctly to play on European machines. Even worse than that are the toy helicopters Michelle Obama got from the White House gift store for the Prime Minister’s kids. Could she be anymore cheap and insulting than that?

Also, remember how Barack Obama promised to “repair” the supposedly damaged relationships with our allies? That was all just phony rhetoric anyway, because there is no damage or at least there was no damage — until now. Obama’s first foray into foreign policy was to insult our closest ally who we need more than ever in Afghanistan. Nice one.

To add insult to injury, when questioned about the botched visit by the PM, a State Department official told the Sunday Telegraph the following:

The real views of many in Obama administration were laid bare by a State Department official involved in planning the Brown visit, who reacted with fury when questioned by The Sunday Telegraph about why the event was so low-key.

The official dismissed any notion of the special relationship, saying: "There’s nothing special about Britain. You’re just the same as the other 190 countries in the world. You shouldn’t expect special treatment."

Trading in cowboy diplomacy for dumbass diplomacy — now that’s change we can believe in.

-Chris Jones

Commander In Cheap: Obama’s Crappy Gifts To Gordon Brown

Chris Jones — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 23:15:26 +0000

President Obama treated our dear British friends the way someone treats a relative they can’t stand but must visit once a year.

British PM Gordon Brown was treated like disposable ally on his first trip to Obama’s America. First Obama snubbed him on the usual official rose garden press conference that are best friends usually get.

Then he made all of us look like assholes with the lame ass gift he gave. He gave Brown (who’s not a film buff) a boxed set of 25 classic American movies on DVD. Wow, he must have had that rushed from Amazon.com.

Michelle Obama gave Gordon Brown’s kids a plastic toy replica of Marine One from the White House gift store. That’s really too egregious for me to even comment on.

Here’s what Gordon Brown gave to Obama:

Mr Brown’s gifts included an ornamental desk pen holder made from the oak timbers of Victorian anti-slaver HMS Gannet, once named HMS President.

Mr Obama was so delighted he has already put it in pride of place in the Oval Office on the Resolute desk which was carved from timbers of Gannet’s sister ship, HMS Resolute.

Another treasure given to the U.S. President was the framed commission for HMS Resolute, a vessel that came to symbolise Anglo-US peace when it was saved from ice packs by Americans and given to Queen Victoria.

Finally, Mr Brown gave a first edition set of the seven-volume classic biography of Churchill by Sir Martin Gilbert.

With all the wealth Obama is stealing from the American taxpayers you’d think he could of at least spent a little on our British friends. How tacky is that?

-Chris Jones

Islamic Capitulation In Britain: Police Dogs To Wear Booties In Muslim Homes

Chris Jones — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 14:14:02 +0000

I guess getting the green light on Sharia law in the U.K. last week just wasn’t quite enough for Britain’s Muslim community. Now the Police are considering new guidelines that would require police dogs to wear “booties” when entering a Mosque or Muslim home.

Originally the guidelines were designed for mosques but are being expanded to include other buildings, such a Muslim homes.

In those guidelines, if Muslims object to the use of the sniffer dogs, then they will only be used in “exceptional” cases and when they are used they will have to wear little booties with rubber soles.

What if you object to being killed in a terrorist attack? Any new guidelines for that?

Of course if any Muslims object to my objecting to being killed in a terrorist attack, then by all means let me die.

-Chris Jones

British Judge Says YES To Sharia Law In Britain

admin — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 22:17:12 +0000

The most senior judge in England gave his blessing today for the use of sharia law to resolve disputes among Muslims.

Chief Justice Lord Phillips said that Sharia law should be used between Muslims to settle family disputes and financial matters in Britain.

There really are no words to describe what a huge mistake this wacked out Judge is making. It’s inconceivable that any sane human being would allow Islam to seize control over more of British life. Islam is absolutely horrible to women and this lunatic Judge is giving the okay for that kind of nonsense to continue.

You can officially say the Muslims have won and the Islamization of Britain is now complete. This would never happen in the U.S. because we’re armed.

Queen Of England Strip Mugabe Of Knighthood?

Chris Jones — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:50:14 +0000

The NY Times is reporting today that Queen Elizabeth II has officially stripped Zimbabwe’s Robert Mugabe of his honory knighthood. The British foreign office says the move was a “mark of revulsion” for his African dictator’s “abject disregard” for Democracy.

The question that really needs to be answered here is how in the hell was Robert Mugabe granted Knighthood? Are they just handing that title out to just anyone these days? The Brits claim he was given Knighthood during a state visit in 1994 when “conditions in Zimbabwe were quite different.”

I’m not sure what “conditions” they’re referring to, but Robert Mugabe has been a vicious third world dictator since the day he took office.

I’m not blaming Britain for having relations with his government, but it’s pretty incredible that a thug like Mugabe would be given Knighthood. Maybe they should have given Knighthood to Mobutu Sese Seko, and other African strong men as well.

THE HOT JOINTS » Britain

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